My So Called Life - The Good, The Bad, The Ugly

Embrace life -- both the sweet days and the bitter...embrace the joy and the sadness...the successes and the defeats -- for all of these things, both good and bad, have made you who you are.

Monday, May 30, 2005

True Porn Clerk Stories - SO DAMN FUNNY!

Ok..my best friend Adam showed me this link over 2 years ago and it is the funniest thing I think I have ever read. It is a blog about this woman who took a job as a Porn Store Clerk. Below are some of my favorite excerpts....the link is further down...

"...I think part of it is that porn, which doesn't have much in the way of scripting or acting chops to move it along, has to rely on other ways to convey intensity: bigger, harder, faster, freakier. There is a new title in the straight section: V8. The caption says "Four in the ass and four in the pussy!" It was the first box that has given me pause in a while. "Sweet Jesus," I thought, "Where would everyone stand?..."

"...Several of our straight porn boxes have a cheerful little blue circle on the front. It's designed to look like a sticker and it says "Gaping Asshole Inside!" in the same sort of cheerful font one might use for "Now with more fiber!" or "New fresh scent! It is clearly meant to be a feature, a sort of guarantee of quality: whatever else may or may not happen in this film, you are guaranteed at least one gaping asshole. Frequently there is also a gaping asshole holding the box, but that issue is not addressed. It baffles me."

"...I am deeply relieved to report that V8 refers to fingers. How sad that I've reached a point in my life that the fact that a woman is only having four fingers jammed up her anus while another four are jammed up her vagina is a relief."

There is more where this came from --- check out the link below!!!

  • True Porn Clerk Stories
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