My So Called Life - The Good, The Bad, The Ugly

Embrace life -- both the sweet days and the bitter...embrace the joy and the sadness...the successes and the defeats -- for all of these things, both good and bad, have made you who you are.

Friday, July 15, 2005

Insecurity - A Nasty Little Virus

I hate insecurity. Im sure most people do. It infects you and just want let go. Now I can sympathize with people who are insecure. I used to be extremely insecure about everything from my opinions to my body image.

Over the years that has changed. Although I wish I was in better shape, I am fine with my body the way it is. I am currently on a plan to get in better shape but I am doing it for ME, and not out of insecurity concerning what OTHER people think.

And as far as my opinions are concerned, if ya dont like em, that is perfectly OK. They are not going to get shaken b/c a few people disagree.

But I was thinking about this earlier this morning. Why is insecurity so devastating to us as individuals. I believe it takes away just that. It takes away our ability to be individuals. It makes us conform to the ideas, the stereotypes, the standards of those around us, and erases all creativity, all ingenuity, and all independence from our thought process.

Insecurity tells us that we are no one if not accepted. Nothing if not part of the group. It attacks the very core of who we are and what we believe in. It can make us change our ideas and even our way of life. It is nothing more than emotional or psychological peer pressure placed upon us by our own feelings.

It can be a relentless, undaunted attack 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Never letting up, never slowing down. So what is the answer....

To be honest with you, I dont know. I could give you one of the generic answers such as:

'Be more confident' - what are the practical steps for that.

'Take more pride in who you are' - again give me practicality - this is too nebulous

'Believe in yourself' - hmmmmm....again same problem...

Maybe the answers are so nebulous b/c the problem is just that as well. Maybe it's possible to nail down an even that caused us to be insecure, but insecurity is something of a nebulous feeling that attacks without warning. So maybe the solution has to be along those same lines.

I dont know how I got over the major insecurity issues in my life. I guess it just took time and learning who I was as a person (again a nebulous answer!). But...I think it is time we took pride in who we are and what we think regardless of outside opinions...

Embrace everything about you...the good, the bad, and even the ugly....

It all contributes to who you are...

And when you hear that little voice in your head that says you aren't good enough or you need this or you need that....just tell it what you would tell last years boyfriend....

"Fuck off bitch..I'm better than you now..."


  • At 3:01 PM, Blogger Jim said…

    EXCELLENT post Matt. And a real issue for many people. Its sometimes difficult for me to understand insecurities; being raised by 2 steel-belted NY'ers I learned early that inner strength is an absolute requirement for survival.

    I guess I have always looked at others opinions as "ok, well thats all your stuff, which is fair and I totally accept, but I have my own opinion and it overrides yours".

    I think I'm a control freak's worst nightmare... lol :)

  • At 3:18 PM, Blogger Matthew said…

    Agreed Jim - good comment - everyone has a right to their own opinion - but we should never feel less b/c our opinion is different


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